Xenosaga IV: Morgenröte
by angelwings37
Summary: Daybreak. The saga continues after the complete events, credits included, of Xenosaga III. Basic reunion storyline with the following pairings: chaos&Kosmos, Shion&Allen, Jr.
1. Chapter 1

The characters and background of Xenosaga are property of Namco and Bandai, and are in no way my own.

Chapter One

Space near Lost Jerusalem, seven years after the events of X III.

The torso of a woman floated gently towards the planet. Ice crystals covered her tattered frame, but her facial expression was entirely peaceful. As she began to enter the gravitational field, her speed started to increase.

At midday on the planet below, a young man was walking down a beach. He had a dark complexion and uniquely identifying silver hair. As he approached the water's edge, he stopped. He lifted his arms out before him, palms up, tilted his head up to the sky and closed his eyes. As he concentrated, his hands began to glow with a bright white light. Out in space, wings sprouted from the back of the woman and wrapped around her in a protective cocoon. She then began her descent into the atmosphere. As the young man stood on the beach, still concentrating, hands still glowing, a shape began to form in the distant sky. As it came closer, the man opened his eyes and moving his hands only slightly, slowed the cocoon. Raising his right hand to about eye level with the palm facing out, he guided to the cocoon to land on the beach several meters away from him. As it landed, the man's hands stopped glowing and he let out a sigh of relief. While he walked towards the cocoon, the wings opened and then started to slowly disappear. He knelt down on the left hand side of the torso of the woman and ran his right hand through her hair. He started to laugh to himself as the silver strands slipped through his fingers and fell back to her side. "I don't think this color suits you at all," he said.

He gazed down at her for a few seconds more, assessing the damage that she had taken. She was missing both legs and her right arm from the shoulder down. Her hair had turned a silvery white, and there was obvious damage to her exterior shell besides the color distortion. Although the man was very happy to see her, his blue eyes seemed very sad as he contemplated all of this.

"I suppose we will have to wait for her to arrive after all," he said. With that, he leaned down and placing his arms underneath her, he lifted her off the ground. He then began to carry her towards the small cabin at the edge of the beach. As he entered the house, the first room was the living and dining area. He pushed open the first door on the right and carried her inside. The room was clearly decorated with a woman in mind. In the center along the far wall was a beautiful white canopy bed with mosquito netting around it. There was a dresser on the left hand side of the room with an end table holding flowers in the far left corner, and on the right hand side was a large picture window with white lace curtains. There was a small bench beneath the window. Looking out the window, one could see the ocean. When he had built the house, he had planned that this room would be for her. He laid her down on the bed and pulled the blanket over her so that it covered her missing legs and arm. He allowed her left arm to rest on top of the blanket. He smoothed her hair which made it look as though she were a fairytale princess, fast asleep.

"I'm sorry, Kosmos, but it looks like you will have to sleep a little longer," the man said gently to her. He then pulled the mosquito netting closed around her bed and walked out of the room, closing the door behind him.


	2. Chapter 2

The characters and background of Xenosaga are property of Namco and Bandai, and are in no way my own.

Chapter Two

In the village not far from the beach, a young girl was playing in a small patch of flowers. She was only four years old. She had auburn hair and blue eyes. As she was singing to herself, she thought she heard a woman's voice call out to her. The young girl looked around and saw no one. She sat for a moment, not knowing what she had heard. Then she heard a man's voice which seemed familiar and warm say "It is time." The young girl stood up and brushed herself off. She then walked to the house of one of the elders, named Rebecca. Rebecca was inside sewing. She herself was only fourteen years old. As the girl entered, Rebecca put down her sewing.

"What can I do for you, Mary?" she asked, smiling gently. Rebecca was responsible for the care of about ten children younger than herself. Mary was one of them.

"I wish to see Abel," Mary replied.

"Abel?" Rebecca looked puzzled. "I don't know of anyone in the village by that name. Is this an animal friend of yours?"

"No," said Mary. "He is a boy who is like me. I am supposed to find him."

Rebecca smiled again. _"The children must be playing a game. I understand now_", she thought. "I'm sorry, Mary, but there is no one in here. You will have to go back and look for him outside. I'm sure you'll find where he is hiding."

"But…" Mary started, before Rebecca interrupted her.

"Now, Mary," she said as she stood up and started to walk towards her. "I'm not sure who you are playing with, or who you are looking for, but he certainly is not in here. Besides, I have work to do before helping prepare tonight's meal. If something bad happens or you are hurt, come back and see me, but I can't help you to win a game." And with that, she showed Mary out the door.

Despite being only seven years old, a new awareness was starting to fill Mary. "_I suppose I will have to find Abel on my own. I wonder what name he DOES go by then…_" she thought to herself. "_I may need more time to think about all of this._" Mary began to walk while thinking, and found herself back at her patch of flowers. Seeing them, she forgot about the voices she had heard, and the name Abel that had come to her as a boy who should be her age, and her need to find him. Instead, she sat back down and began to play again, humming softly to herself. Yet the song she was humming was something that had not been heard on this planet before.


	3. Chapter 3

The characters and background of Xenosaga are property of Namco and Bandai, and are in no way my own.

Chapter Three

One year later

The young man with the silver hair was in the wood, not far from his house, gathering roots, herbs and berries. Along the path from the village came a boy of thirteen, with black shoulder length hair and emerald eyes. When he noticed the man with silver hair, he smiled and called out to him. "Good morning, Yeshua!"

Yeshua looked up and over at the boy. "Ah. Good morning to you, Joseph." He smiled. "What can I do for you today?"

"Actually, I was hoping that I could help you," said Joseph. "Are you gathering things to make medicine?"

"Yes. Here, take this basket and pick some berries from that bush for me, okay?"

"Of course, Yeshua," said the boy with a smile as he took the basket. The two worked in silence for a little while before Yeshua spoke again.

"Why have you really come to see me today, Joseph?" Joseph turned red from embarrassment. Yeshua always knew things. He wondered why he couldn't be honest always as Yeshua wanted.

"I had another dream last night. This time, the woman was crying. But I could do nothing to help her. I never see her face. I'm not sure that I even know her. Why do I dream these things?" Joseph stopped picking berries and turned towards Yeshua. His eyes showed deep confusion and emotion, almost brimming with tears.

Yeshua looked at Joseph, his eyes slightly sad as well. "That is something I think you will have to find for yourself, Joseph; it is not something I can explain for you. However, I do think that you may find your answer in the near future."

Joseph looked at the ground. If Yeshua, who knew so much, couldn't tell him the answer, how was he going to find it himself? It didn't make any sense at all.

"Why don't you come with me to my house?" Yeshua offered. "I will make us some tea, and there is something I want to show you." Yeshua stood up and walked over to Joseph. He offered his hand to help Joseph up, and smiled. "Come on, Joseph."

Joseph looked up. He took Yeshua's hand, and stood up. Letting go, he picked up the basket with berries and followed Yeshua to the house. When they came in, Yeshua gestured for Joseph to place the berries on a shelf. He then began to make some tea. Joseph sat down on a bench at the table. The two were silent as Yeshua prepared the tea and then poured it. As he sat down with Joseph at the table, they silently sipped their tea. Yeshua was looking down at his cup, seeming to be lost in thought. Joseph gazed at him curiously, wondering what he was thinking about and what he had wanted to show him.

"Yeshua," began Joseph, finally, when he had finished his tea. Yeshua looked up and smiled.

"Oh, yes. Please, follow me." Yeshua got up and headed for the first bedroom. Joseph followed behind him. As Yeshua opened the door and entered, Joseph stopped in the doorway. Something in the atmosphere of the white lace and the scent of flowers made him feel as though he was entering a sacred area. As he looked around he noticed that Yeshua had pulled back the netting around the bed and was kneeling at its side, holding the hand of woman who was sleeping. Joseph made a slight gasp. Yeshua looked over at him and said, "It's all right, Joseph. Please, enter." Joseph nodded and walked slowly over to the bed. He had never seen Yeshua with a woman before and wondered who this person could be. As he came to the side of the bed, he knelt down next to Yeshua on his left side. Yeshua's eyes were closed, and Joseph looked at the woman, trying to figure out if they were possibly related. Her hair was silver like Yeshua's, but her skin was very pale. She looked very beautiful and peaceful.

"Is she sleeping, Yeshua?" Joseph asked, turning to look at him. Yeshua opened his eyes, but looked at the woman, not at Joseph as he replied.

"Yes, she is."

"But it's the middle of the day. Is she sick?"

"You could say that, yes."

Joseph was silent for a moment. "Can't you make her some medicine to make her better?"

"There are some things which are impossible even for me." Yeshua turned his gaze to Joseph. He smiled slightly and said, "But that does not mean they are altogether impossible." Yeshua looked back at the sleeping woman again. "Sometimes there are things that we want which are outside of our grasp, whether they are material things or abstract knowledge. But just because at that exact moment we cannot have something, does not mean that we will never will. I believe that we all have a purpose, a reason for existing, a destiny even, and that small things will happen along the way to that end which are fated to happen. We must believe that if we pray and believe and will strongly enough for something to happen, that it will happen. And I believe that one day she will open her eyes again and be able to leave this bed. But until that time, I must wait patiently."

Joseph turned his gaze from Yeshua to the woman as he stopped speaking. "_Yeshua," _thought Joseph, "_this person is so important to you; I hope that I can meet her one day as well._"

"If you can be strong and wait patiently, Yeshua, then I too will wait patiently for the meaning of my dreams to unfurl."

Yeshua turned to look at Joseph, smiling warmly. "I'm very proud of you, Joseph. Now, let's go and see how everyone's doing back in the village." With that, Joseph stood up and started to head towards the door. Yeshua squeezed the hand of the woman before standing and replacing the netting around her bed. He closed the door gently as he left the room, and he and Joseph headed out the front door together, down the path through the woods towards the village. Although their conversation had changed to medicine and herbs, Joseph was still thinking about the secret that Yeshua had shared with him that day. He felt that he had seen a different side of Yeshua by being allowed to see this woman who lived in Yeshua's house, and decided he would show Yeshua how trustworthy he was by not telling anyone else what he had seen.


	4. Chapter 4

The characters and background of Xenosaga are property of Namco and Bandai, and are in no way my own.

Chapter IV

Onboard the Elsa

Shion was coming out of the women's quarters when she heard Captain Matthews page her.

"Shion."

"Yes, Captain?"

"There's a call coming in for you. Where do you want me to route it?"

"I'll take it at the communications center outside the bridge, thank you." Shion headed over to the terminal, but couldn't believe her eyes. "Momo?"

"Hi, Shion! You look a little bit surprised." Shion had reason to be, certainly. The last time she had seen Momo, six months ago, Momo had the appearance of a twelve year old girl. Instead, there was a young woman on the screen. She still had her golden eyes and same smile, but her pink hair was longer, falling six inches past her shoulders and curled at the ends. Her hair was parted on the side and she had sweeping bangs that framed her face. She had a petite but slightly curvy figure, and was wearing a cream colored turtleneck sweater with a grey skirt and dark stockings.

"Momo, I don't understand. You look incredible, but when did this happen?" Shion asked as she finally found the words.

Momo laughed. "It was just over two months ago. Daddy had always planned that I should have an adult Realian body. Mommy and Ziggy decided that the time was right for me to make that adjustment. It was a little strange at first, but I'm getting used to it now. I have all of my original functions, but this body is closer to a human body. Isn't that exciting?"

Shion smiled. "It certainly is. I'm glad to see you've had the chance to grow up. I'm sorry if I seemed rude earlier, you just took me by surprise."

"I know. I wanted to tell you that we are expanding the range of our gates, and our total radial distance is now five astronomical units. I'm not sure of your exact location at this point, but hopefully that will make your trip back to the Dammerung quicker."

"That's great news, Momo. I'm glad to hear of your accomplishments."

"Hey, Shion…." Momo paused. She looked down and appeared to be nervous. "Um, is Jr. around by any chance?"

Shion smiled again. "I'll go get him for you. Just wait a minute."

"Okay!" Momo was excited. She hoped that Jr. would be excited to see her too, but she was worried about what he would think. Shion walked onto the bridge where Jr. was chatting with Captain Matthews about their course.

"Jr.?"

"What's up, Shion?" he asked, turning to look at her.

"There's a call for you on the communications center just outside."

"All right. Matthews, I'll be right back."

"No problem, Little Master," he replied.

Shion stepped to the side as Jr. walked past her on his way out the door. She wondered how Jr. would react, but decided it would be better for her to stay on the bridge for the time being and allow him some privacy. As Jr. came round the corner he saw Momo and gasped, losing his breath for a moment at the sight of her. "Momo!" he said, unable to believe his eyes as he came to the center of the communications desk.

"Jr! I'm so happy to see you! How are you? How is the search going? What have you been up to since the last time we talked?" Momo was very excited to see Jr., and waited eagerly to hear his responses. She also waited to hear what he thought of her new body, but she thought she would wait for him to mention it.

Jr. was confused. He kept looking at her, his mouth partially open as if to say something but unable to find the words. His expression seemed to be confusion, loss, and shock all at the same time. Finally, he managed to say "Momo…you…"

Momo looked sad. "You don't like it," she said.

"I…" Jr. started, but lost his words again. He looked down at the ground, feeling ashamed that he couldn't bring himself to face her.

Momo looked as though she was about to cry, but Jr. didn't notice. "Can't you say anything to me, Jr.?"

"I...I…" was all that he could manage to say. Just as Momo was about to start crying, Ziggy, who had been listening next door came into the room.

"Momo, your mother needs to see you for a minute. Besides, I need to speak to Jr. and Shion as well." Momo nodded and slowly got up and headed for the door. She wondered if she had made a mistake by agreeing to change to an older body. Why couldn't Jr. say anything to her?

Ziggy sat down at the terminal and waited for Momo to leave the room. He then spoke. "Jr."

Jr. didn't reply. He didn't even look up. He kept thinking about Momo and the fact that she was a woman now. He didn't know how to articulate what he was thinking or feeling.

"Jr.," Ziggy began again. "I don't know what you are thinking right now, but I hope that you can be supportive of Momo. Her adult form is something that Dr. Mizrahi had originally intended for her, and something that her mother and I both felt was the right thing for her. I don't know your feelings, but I do know that Momo cares about you and needs your support. Mary and Shelley said that you were stopping your own cell growth to stay at the appearance of twelve. If our enemy threat no longer exists, and you have made peace with your brother, what is the reason for still punishing yourself now? You are the one who asked me to undergo life expansion for Momo. Now, I am asking you to do something for her as well."

Jr. still said nothing. He heard everything that Ziggy said, but it felt like his head was swimming. He couldn't concentrate, and made no effort to respond.

After a silence, Ziggy spoke again. "If it's all right, I'd like to speak to Shion."

Jr. walked to the bridge and said "Shion. Ziggy." He then headed for his quarters so he could be alone and think. When Shion looked at him, she knew that he was upset. She started to worry about Momo and what had happened between them. She came out and saw Ziggy waiting to speak to her.

"Is everything all right?" she asked.

"I'm sure that it will be in time. Listen, Shion, Momo has her mother and me to reassure her. I'm going to have to ask you and Allen to support Jr."

"I understand. You can count on us, Ziggy," Shion said with a light smile.

Ziggy smiled slightly, too. "I knew that I could. We hope to hear from you again soon. Goodbye."

"Goodbye," said Shion. "_Poor Jr.,"_ she thought. "_I wonder if I should try talking to him now, or give him some time on his own_." Deciding on the latter of the two options, she walked back onto the bridge to get an update on their status.

Inside the men's quarters, Jr. lay on his bed and thought about what Ziggy had said. He wondered if he believed in himself. Jr. started to cry a little before wiping away the tears. As his head started to spin again, he decided that the best thing to do at the moment was to sleep.


	5. Chapter 5

The characters and background of Xenosaga are property of Namco and Bandai, and are in no way my own.

Chapter V

As Shion entered the bridge, Captain Matthews asked her about her call. "What did they have to say back at the Dammerung?"

Shion stepped forward so that she was next to Hammer and Matthews. "They've expanded the gates out to a total diameter of ten astronomical units."

"Hey, that's great!" said Matthews. "Pretty soon they'll be caught up with us, huh? That'll sure make going back easier."

"Yes, I suppose so. What's our current status? Any signs of planets yet?"

"Nothing yet," said Hammer. "I refresh the search every five minutes."

"Do you want us to stay on this course?" asked Matthews.

"Yes. If we continue in the same direction, it will make it easier when we want to turn around. Besides, we have to explore this space at some point." She sat at one of the terminals for about ten minutes, thinking about what she should do for Jr. "If you guys need me, I'll be heading down to the Robot Academy."

"Affirmative," said Matthews, as Shion headed out the door.

Shion took the elevator down to the lower level, and walked down the hall, entering the Robot Academy. The Professor was standing on one side of a table explaining some schematics he had drawn up, and Allen and Scott were on the other side of the table listening.

"Now with this few small modifications," said the Professor, "I believe we can increase output ten fold."

"That's amazing, Professor!" said Scott, quite excited.

Allen noticed that Shion had entered the room. "Hey, Shion. Come to see what we are working on?"

"Not right now. I was actually hoping that I could talk to you for a minute, Allen."

"Sure, no problem. Professor, I'll be right back."

"You'd better be," said the Professor, "or you'll be demoted!!"

Allen shook his head and walked over to Shion. He kissed her lightly and said "What's up?"

"Here, come with me for a minute," she said as she led him out the door. They walked a little ways up the hallway, where Shion felt they could have some privacy. "It's about Jr."

"What happened to Jr.?"

"Well, I got a call from Momo to tell me about their progress."

"That's great! How are things coming along?"

"They have a total diameter of ten astronomical units now."

"Fantastic! They really are making progress."

"Allen, can I tell you what's wrong with Jr.?"

"Oh right, sorry."

Shion sighed. "Momo has upgraded to her adult form. She has the appearance of a beautiful young woman. After she gave me the update, she asked to speak to Jr. I don't know exactly what was said, but he took something really hard. He hardly spoke and went to his room. When I came back, Momo had gone too, and I spoke to Ziggy. He seemed worried about both of them."

"Wow, that's heavy," said Allen, trying to imagine what it must have been like for Jr. to see the girl he cared about so much suddenly as a beautiful woman. He wondered if that made her out of Jr.'s league. "So what can we do?"

"Well, I was hoping that maybe you could talk to him. Just see if he wants to talk about anything, maybe give him some advice."

Allen smiled. "No problem. I'd do anything for you." He lent in to kiss her again, but Shion stopped him by putting her left forefinger against his lips.

"You are doing this for Jr. and Momo, not for me."

"Oh right," said Allen, chuckling slightly. "Well, I suppose I'd do just about anything for Momo as well."

Shion started to laugh as well, noticing he specifically hadn't mentioned Jr.'s name. "What do I see in you again?"

"I don't know," said Allen, "but I'm sure glad that you do."

They both laughed briefly before Shion kissed him. After sharing a somewhat extended, deep kiss, they both headed back up the elevator, hand in hand.

When they arrived on the second floor, Shion waited outside while Allen went into the men's quarters to check on Jr. She had her fingers crossed, but was surprised when Allen came back out in only a minute. "That was very brief," she said, looking at Allen for some excuse.

"He's sleeping. Was I supposed to wake him up?"

"No. I hope everything's all right."

"I'll come back and try again later, okay? Meanwhile, I'm going to go back to the Academy and see how I can help Scott and the Professor. You should come back sometime and see what we are working on."

"I will." Shion smiled at him. Allen kissed her on the forehead before heading back down the elevator. Shion stood there for a moment longer, thinking about Jr. and Momo. Suddenly, she heard someone softly call her name.

"Shion."

Shion looked around, but there was no one there. "_What in the world? I feel like I know that voice_," she thought. Then she heard it again.

"Shion."

"chaos?" Shion looked around again, but realized that if she _was_ hearing chaos, it was probably telepathically. It had been eight years since she'd heard his voice.

"Shion, you are getting close now. I know it won't be long. Please adjust your heading by bearing thirty-five degrees starboard."

"_chaos!_" Shion thought loudly, but there was no reply. Taking a moment to arrange her thoughts, she ran onto the bridge. "Captain, please change the heading by thirty-five degrees to the starboard side."

Matthews shrugged. "You're the boss. All right, Tony, Hammer, you heard the lady!"

"Yes, sir!" they said in unison. As the ship made its turn, Jr. entered the bridge.

"What's going on?" he asked.

"We're changing course," Shion replied. "How are you feeling?"

"I'm fine." While he said it quite convincingly, Shion felt that something in his eyes betrayed him. She observed him for a little while, but he was certainly acting like his normal self with the other guys. "_Jr…"_ she thought, full of concern.


	6. Chapter 6

The characters and background of Xenosaga are property of Namco and Bandai, and are in no way my own.

Chapter VI

Two months later

Things were primarily the same onboard the Elsa. Allen, Scott, and the Professor were building something in the robot academy, Shion wandered as she pleased, finding various things to do, and Jr. refused to talk about Momo. He tried to act as if the incident hadn't happened. Shion had contacted Ziggy again, so Momo wouldn't ask her about Jr., and had asked him to relay a message that they should focus the next gate in the direction that the Elsa was headed. This seemed like a reasonable request, and Ziggy agreed to inform Momo and Scientia.

It was early one morning, and Shion lay asleep. She started to dream. She was on a beach, looking out at the ocean. As the waves washed upon the shore, Shion wondered if she had been to this place before. She turned to see the rest of her surroundings and was surprised to see a house at the edge of the beach, and a man walking towards her. As he came closer, Shion recognized his smiling face and called out to him. "chaos!"

"Hello, Shion," he said. He came to where she was standing and stopped, about five feet from her. "It's only a short time now until we see each other again."

"chaos, what is this place?"

"This is Lost Jerusalem. Please, Shion, I must ask you a favor. When you reach the planet, please leave the Elsa in orbit. Bring only a pod down to this beach."

"But why?"

"I'll explain when you get here. Please, Shion, remember what I've asked of you."

"chaos, wait!" Shion reached out her hand, but the scene was already fading. She woke up and looked around. The room was completely dark. "Lost Jerusalem…" Shion closed her eyes and fell back asleep.

She spent the next couple of days on the bridge, eagerly awaiting an announcement of a discovery from Hammer. She didn't tell anyone about her dream, even Allen, for she wasn't sure what they would think. On the third day, her hopes were fulfilled.

"Captain!" yelled Hammer, getting excited. "There's a planet on radar, approximately 500,000 km from us. We could be there later today!"

"Good work," said Matthews. "We'll check it out."

"Captain!" said Shion, jumping up from her chair.

"What is it?"

"When we arrive at the planet, I'd like for the Elsa to remain in orbit temporarily. Jr., Allen, and I will head down in one of the exploration craft to check things out."

"Whatever you say, boss," said Matthews. Hammer looked visibly disappointed.

"Then we're agreed. I'll go inform the others of what's going on and start preparation. Let me know when we enter orbit." With that, Shion left the bridge to find Jr. and Allen and start getting ready to go. "_Not long now at all,"_ she thought.

Down on Lost Jerusalem, chaos was sitting on the beach, staring off at the ocean. A little girl and boy came walking down the beach to sit beside him. chaos looked at the two, who were only a little over eight and smiled.

"Hello, Mary. Who is your friend?"

"This is Raphael," said Mary. The little boy with brown hair and deep brown eyes looked at chaos, but said nothing.

"It's nice to meet you, Raphael. So, Mary, what can I do for you today?"

"They're coming soon, aren't they? And then, things are going to change."

"Yes, but it will be slow and take time. There is no reason for you to be afraid."

"Yeshua, now that I have found Raphael, I don't want these memories anymore."

"All right," he said as he placed his left hand on her head. "Close your eyes." Mary did as instructed and chaos closed his eyes, too. His hand glowed slightly for a minute and then he removed it, opening his eyes. "So, what will you two do today?"

Mary opened her eyes. The sadness that had seemed hidden in them moments ago was gone. She looked at Raphael. He smiled and said "I want to swim!" Jumping up, he ran down to the water.

"Wait for me, Raphael," said Mary, running after him.

chaos smiled as he watched the two children play in the shallow water. It was best for the two of them to have a fresh start he thought to himself. He looked up at the sky, knowing that he would have guests that evening, and wondering what he should prepare for dinner.


	7. Chapter 7

The characters and background of Xenosaga are property of Namco and Bandai, and are in no way my own.

Chapter VII

In the hangar of the Elsa, Allen, Shion, and Jr. prepared for their descent. They were loading supplies into the small craft they would use to travel to the surface. Shion noticed that Jr. was loading a box of ammunition.

"Do you really think that's going to be necessary?"

"I like to be prepared. Wouldn't you rather be safe than sorry?"

Shion shook her head. Of course, he did have a point, though she hated to admit it. Allen was just loading the last box when Matthews' voice came over the intercom system.

"Hey, Shion. We've entered orbit. Let me know when you guys are ready to go."

Shion looked at the other two, growing excited. "Thanks, Captain," she said. "I think we'll be ready in just a few more minutes."

"All right, just let us know."

"Well, are we ready to do this?" Shion asked her companions. Jr. nodded.

"I suppose, but really, Shion, what are we expecting to find?" asked Allen.

"We'll know when we find it," said Jr. "Now come on, I'm ready to put my feet on land."

"Right," said Shion. The three entered the ship and took their seats. Jr. was piloting, and Allen was navigating. Shion sat behind them. After powering the ship up, Jr. contacted Matthews.

"Okay, Captain, we are ready to go, just waiting on you now."

"All right, Little Master, you guys are clear to go. Keep us posted on your situation."

"Roger that," Jr. replied as the hangar door opened. The small craft lifted off the platform and out into space. Jr. began to take the ship through the atmosphere. The craft made it through with only a little turbulence. Things seemed routine, but after passing entirely through the atmosphere Jr. began to look nervous. "Um, Allen, can you check your instruments?"

"No problem. Everything looks fine."

"Really? That's strange."

"What's the matter Jr.?" asked Shion, looking forward to see if she could see anything.

"Well, it's just that…here, let me show you." With that, Jr. took his hands off the controls.

"What are you doing!" screamed Allen.

"Allen, calm down," said Shion. "Just look." Despite the fact that Jr. was not piloting the ship, they were not falling, and the ship seemed to stay at a steady pace, even making its own slight turns to adjust its course.

"The last time I checked, this thing didn't have autopilot," said Jr., looking at Allen, then Shion. Allen looked worried. Shion seemed intrigued.

"I suppose someone is guiding us to our destination."

"What! Who?!?" Allen turned around and looked worried. Shion laughed.

"Let's just stay calm and patient. As long as things are going well, I don't see a need to worry. It's just like riding in an elevator."

"You know something, don't you," said Jr. turning around in his seat and examining Shion closely. "What aren't you telling us?"

"I don't know anything more than either of you," she insisted. "I just have my suspicions, that's all. And I'm willing to wait a little longer to find the answer."

"You want to share those suspicions with us?" asked Jr., raising one eyebrow.

"Not really. Come on, just relax."

"I hate when you keep secrets," said Allen, looking slightly hurt.

"Oh Allen, really! It's nothing like that at all." Shion sat back in her seat and closed her eyes, resting. Jr. looked at her a moment longer, then turned around and did the same. Maybe Shion was right. Allen kept looking out the window and at the controls. He wanted to know if they were about to crash before it happened. Within thirty minutes, he was calling for the others to look out the window as they were approaching land. What they saw was the white sand of a beach, leading up to a luscious green forest.

"It's gorgeous!" exclaimed Shion.

"Yes, but do you see anyone?" asked Allen, searching the beach.

"It can't be. Look!" Jr. pointed out his window, and the other two peered over to see what he was pointing at. Someone with silver hair was standing on the beach with his arms outstretched above him.

Shion smiled. "It is. It's chaos. I know it is."

"Wait until I get a hold of that guy," said Jr., growing excited about meeting his old friend. As the ship finally landed, chaos brought his arms down and started to walk toward the ship. The door opened and Jr. and Shion came running out, screaming at the same time, "chaos!!" Allen was behind them.

"Wait for me, guys!" he yelled, trying to catch up.

Shion and Jr. reached chaos at the same time, and threw their arms around him, resulting in a group hug. chaos hugged them back, smiling.

"chaos, I'm so glad to see you," said Shion as they all released.

"You bastard," said Jr. "I really thought you were dead."

"Sorry," said chaos. Just then Allen reached them, and shook chaos' hand. "Hello again, Allen."

"Hello, chaos," he replied with a smile.

"Please, let me welcome you all to Lost Jerusalem. It's a bit of a walk still, I'm afraid, so we'll have to carry whatever your essentials are that you've brought with you."

"Lost Jerusalem," said Shion, her eyes brimming with tears. "We've finally made it."

chaos smiled and put a hand on her shoulder. "Come on, there is more to see." They walked back to the ship and the three new arrivals each grabbed a bag with some of their things. chaos carried a bag of basic supplies. Closing up the craft, they started to walk down the beach. After a few hundred kilometers, they arrived at chaos' house. "I apologize that it is small," he said as they entered, "but it meets my needs."

"Did you build this yourself?" asked Jr., setting down his bag in the hall and coming into the dining area.

"Mostly," said chaos. "Please, everyone, sit down and I'll fix you something to eat and drink while I tell you about the past eight years." The guests sat at the table, with Shion and Allen sharing a bench on the side of the table that faced the kitchen, and Jr. sitting on the opposite bench which faced the front of the house. After chaos set plates and water for them, he sat down next to Jr. and began to explain what had happened.


	8. Chapter 8

The characters and background of Xenosaga are property of Namco and Bandai, and are in no way my own.

Chapter VIII

chaos explained that eight years ago, due to sacrifices made by Jin and Kosmos, he and Nephilim had been able to seal the Gnosis and travel with all of their souls and Abel to Lost Jerusalem. Once they arrived, they set to work on the rebirth of the souls as humans.

Since there were no adults, they decided that the souls would all be reborn as children, ranging from ages five to seven. The first year, one fifth of all the souls were reborn, divided into these age groups. The same strategy was used for the next three years. For those first four years, chaos, Nephilim, and Abel had served as leaders, helping to establish a community and culture. The elder children started to learn trades and take on responsibilities so they could eventually be the elders. After four years, Nephilim and Abel wanted to start their own lives over and be reborn, and so in the fifth year as the last of the souls were reborn, Abel and Nephilim were added to their numbers and reborn as well. By this time, the eldest children were turning twelve, and chaos felt that they were capable of handling most things on their own. And so, he started taking less of a role, going to visit every day and see how things were going, but mostly serving as a wise man of sorts, who the children could come to if they needed his assistance.

"Jin…" said Shion, looking sad. "I had known that would have to have been his fate, but I never wanted to accept it."

"I'm sorry, Shion," said chaos, his eyes with their typically melancholic look.

Changing the subject, Jr. said, "Well, I guess we should fill you in on what's happened with us in the past eight years." Jr. went on to describe their search, which had commenced almost immediately eight years ago, with a few return trips to the Dammerung. Momo in conjunction with Scientia were establishing gates to replace the columns in order to decrease travel time through space. A few other ships that had survived had made their way to the Dammerung, and it was currently serving as the base for all humanity (that they knew of). Other ships were scouting space as well, searching for inhabitable planets, but most had been destroyed. "Oh yeah, and Shion and Allen got married," Jr. said, grinning. Allen put his hand over Shion's, beaming. Shion smiled as she looked at him.

"That's wonderful," said chaos. "Any children?"

"Not yet," said Allen.

"But we're still considering them," said Shion as Allen leaned over and kissed her cheek.

Just then, they heard the front door open and a voice called out, "Yeshua, are you home?"

chaos stood up. "Come in, Joseph."

"Yeshua?" questioned Shion. chaos shrugged his shoulders. The black haired teen came down the hall but stopped as he entered the dining area.

"Oh! You have guests."

"It's all right, come in. I want you to meet these people. These are my friends Shion, Allen, and Jr. Everyone, this is my apprentice, Joseph." Joseph beamed at being called chaos' apprentice.

"Hello," he said. Then, turning to chaos he said, "I've brought you the roots that you wanted. Also, I cut some fresh flowers for the lady's room."

"Thank you," said chaos, taking the flowers from Joseph's hand. "Please put the roots on the shelves."

As Joseph was doing this and chaos was trimming the ends of the flowers, Jr. leaned across the table and whispered, "The lady?" Allen shrugged his shoulders, and Shion looked puzzled.

chaos came back over to the dining area and spoke again. "Joseph, please help yourself to some nourishment. Shion, if you would follow me, there is something I'd like to show you." Shion got up from the table and followed chaos. Allen and Jr. looked at each other, across the table, with the same look, which said what is she getting to see that we aren't, I wonder.

chaos led Shion into the first bedroom, asking her to shut the door after she came in. He set the flowers temporarily on the bench by the window, and made his way to the bed. Pulling back the netting, he knelt down at the side of the bed, as he had done so many times in the past year. As Shion came closer, she gasped at what she saw. "Kosmos!!"

chaos smiled. "Yes, it is Kosmos. Please, come closer, Shion." Shion walked over to the bed, and knelt down beside chaos. Tears came to her eyes.

"chaos, what has happened to her?"

chaos took a deep breath. "She took vast damage in the final battle, sacrificing herself as I have already stated. It then took seven years for her tattered frame to float through space and come here. For the past year, she has lain here, exactly as you see her now."

Shion looked at chaos and could see the sadness in his eyes. "chaos…"

"I haven't tried to wake her. I wasn't sure how long she would function without repairs. And so, I have waited for you to come, so that you can salvage her consciousness and give her a new body."

"Oh, Kosmos." Shion almost started to cry as she looked at her. "May I examine her more closely?"

"Please do," said chaos. He stood up and walked back to the bench, picking up the fresh flowers Joseph had brought. He then walked over to the vase and replaced the old flowers as Shion pulled down the blankets to see the extent of Kosmos' damage. chaos walked to the window and looked out at the ocean, trying not to look at the image of Kosmos' broken body.

In the dining area, Joseph had fixed a plate and sat down on the bench next to Jr. Jr. winked at Allen, and then started to probe Joseph for information. "So, chaos has a girlfriend, huh?"

"Who is chaos?" Joseph asked, looking at Jr. with interest and no sign of knowing who he meant.

"Uh, sorry. I meant Yeshua. He has a girlfriend?"

"I don't know what a girlfriend is." Joseph went back to eating.

"Who did you cut the flowers for?"

Joseph didn't look up. "Those are for the lady in the white room. She is very sick. She sleeps all the time."

Allen looked at Jr. as though this wasn't getting them any information. Jr. continued his line of inquiry. "Do you know her name?"

"No, Yeshua has never told me. I just know that Yeshua visits her everyday, sometimes several times a day, always hoping she will wake up, but she never does. She's very pretty, with skin like snow."

"You don't think," said Allen, raising his eyebrows.

"It couldn't be!" said Jr. He jumped up from the table, but Joseph was faster. He grabbed a walking stick from beside the shelves and made it to the door before Allen and Jr. could. Holding the stick before him, almost as one would hold a sword, Joseph barred their entry.

"I refuse to allow you to enter this room without Yeshua's permission!" The boy narrowed his eyes and looked ready to strike. Allen and Jr. both stopped in their tracks.

"Allen, do you see what I think I'm seeing?"

"I think I might. Is it possible? His coloring and that stance…it's just too strange for it not to be!"

"Come on," said Jr. looking as though he had seen a ghost. "Let's just wait for them at the table." Allen nodded and they both sat back down, but Joseph did not leave his post.


	9. Chapter 9

The characters and background of Xenosaga are property of Namco and Bandai, and are in no way my own.

Chapter IX

Shion pulled the blankets back up over Kosmos and caressed her face. She turned to face chaos, who was still looking out the window. "I can see what you mean. She will definitely need a new body; this one is beyond repair." chaos nodded his head. Shion walked over and placed her hand on his arm. "chaos…" chaos turned to her and smiled lightly.

"It's all right. Come on, let's rejoin the others." chaos headed for the door, with Shion following behind him. As he opened the door, he was surprised to see Joseph, weapon in hand and ready to strike. "Joseph, what is going on?"

Joseph spun around. "Yeshua! These men tried to violate her sanctuary, but I wouldn't allow them." chaos smiled, and placing his left hand on Joseph's shoulder he took the stick away with his right hand.

"Thank you, Joseph, but I'm sure that these men didn't mean any harm and won't try such a thing again."

"But…" said Joseph, turning to look at Allen and Jr., then looking back at chaos. From behind, Shion observed this, thinking there was something familiar about this boy that she just couldn't put her finger on.

"Listen, Joseph, it's late and I wouldn't want you to walk back through the woods alone. Why don't you stay here tonight? You can sleep in my room."

"Are you sure it will be all right?"

"Yes," chaos replied as he walked the teen to his room. Joseph stopped at the door and looked back at Allen and Jr. again.

"If they try anything else, just call me and I'll come to help you."

chaos laughed. "I'm sure there won't be any problems, Joseph. Just get some rest."

"All right. But I will come if you call for me. Goodnight, Yeshua."

"Goodnight, Joseph." With that, the boy entered the room and closed the door behind him. Shion sat down at the table next to Allen. chaos turned around and headed back to the table. "I'm sorry about that. He's a really good kid."

"Yeah," said Jr. "He reminds me of someone I used to know. Did you teach him to use a stick like that?"

"No, I'm not sure where he learned that. It was quite strange, really."

"I'll say!" said Allen.

"Yeah," added Jr., narrowing his eyes as he looked at chaos. "He held it like you would hold a katana."

chaos sighed. "I see. Well, since it appears that you have already figured it out, I might as well tell you. Joseph is the reincarnation of Jin."

"Jin!!" Shion jumped up. "Why didn't you say so sooner!?"

"Shion, please calm down," said chaos, motioning with his hands for her to sit back down. "He has no memories of you."

"What?" she asked, with a look of shock and pain as she returned to her seat. "No memories?"

"As I've already told you, all the souls were reborn without memories of their past lives. It was just easier that way."

Allen put his arm around Shion to comfort her.

"Well, that can't be totally true," said Jr. "After all, look at how he just handled that stick!"

"It's not unusual for people to retain certain pieces of their past lives. But you have to admit that he came into this house and did not respond to any of your faces or names with familiarity. That doesn't mean he can't be part of your lives or won't eventually remember something. After all, he was the one who first approached me. What I'm saying is that while he is your brother, you can't expect to walk up to him and address him as Jin and for him to be that exact same person."

Shion put her head in her hands. Then looking up again, she said "Well, I suppose that we should be happy he still exists." The others smiled and nodded in agreement.

"I'll have to apologize again," said chaos, "but this is the only space I have left so we will have to kind of rough it tonight. We'll have a busy day tomorrow." He and Jr. then moved the table out of the way, and they put down sleeping bags. They all said goodnight and lay down to sleep.

After a little while, when Jr. thought that chaos was asleep, he rolled over towards Shion and whispered, "Hey, Shion. What did chaos show you inside of that room?"

"Kosmos," came her reply.

"But that would mean…"

"We'll talk about it tomorrow when he's not around."


	10. Chapter 10

The characters and background of Xenosaga are property of Namco and Bandai, and are in no way my own.

Chapter X

The next day certainly was a busy one. After breakfast, Jr. headed back to their craft to contact Matthews and let them know the situation. chaos started to talk to Allen and Shion about the possibility of them living on Lost Jerusalem, and what number of houses they might need to start building. Shion and Allen agreed that they would definitely want one, and probably should count Jr. in as well. As for the rest of the crew, they would have to ask them personally. And then, there were Momo and Ziggy to consider, besides others on the Dammerung. chaos suggested that they should take things slow, starting with those who had already arrived, and worrying about the others later, as they made their decisions to come.

When Jr. returned, they asked him about a house and he agreed that he would like one as well, right along the beach like chaos' house. Shion and Allen agreed that it was a great location. Shion suggested that they should rendezvous with the Elsa to discuss the options with the crew, and to bring more things down to the planet. chaos planned to go and find his group of woodsmen and carpenters to get started on the building and planning. Shion, Allen, and Jr. said they expected to be back later that evening, and chaos said he would have dinner for them when they arrived. Once they made it into the craft and had taken off, Jr. decided it was a good time to bring up the conversation from last night.

"So, Kosmos is staying in the other room of chaos' house, huh?"

"Yes," said Shion, though she didn't sound happy.

"Shion, that's great!" said Allen, enthusiastically. "It looks like we'll all be reunited. All we need to do is bring down her maintenance bed, right?"

"It's not going to be that simple. She's missing both of her legs, as well as her right arm. What's left of her frame has taken serious damage. She will require a new body. It would be pointless to just try and repair her."

"Hey, that's not a problem," said Allen. "After all, the Professor and Scott and I have been working on creating…"

Shion interrupted him. "I was thinking that maybe she didn't have to be an android."

"What are you suggesting?" asked Jr. Allen looked confused as well.

"I'll have to talk to the Professor, but I was hoping that maybe we could transfer her consciousness into a Realian body."

"Ah, I get it," said Jr. with a smirk. "You're thinking about chaos."

"chaos?" asked Allen, still confused.

"There are many reasons I'm considering it," she replied. "First of all, we've defeated the enemy threat for which she was created, so if we are all receiving a break from war, doesn't she deserve one as well? Secondly, as Allen has pointed out, they have almost finished creating a replacement for her at the Robot Academy. And then, yes, there is chaos. We've already seen that he had a history with Kosmos' human form, Mary. If you could have seen the room, you would know that he still cares for her. She looks like a sleeping princess who may open her eyes at any time."

"That's similar to how Joseph described it," said Allen, thoughtfully.

"Yeah," said Jr. "While you were in the room, Joseph told us that chaos visits her everyday, waiting for her to wake up. Joseph seems to think that she has some kind of sickness that their medicine can't cure. I guess chaos didn't want to explain the entire situation to him."

"The other thing I wonder, is does she have feelings for him, buried somewhere deep inside of her? If so, a Realian body would really be the fairest thing for both of them."

"Hell, I say if it's possible, let's do it!" said Jr.

"I agree," said Allen. "They've both done a lot for us."

Shion smiled. "I'm glad you guys agree. When we get to the ship, Jr., you check in with the Captain and the others, and get their feelings on living on Lost Jerusalem. Allen and I will go see the Professor. Then I'll report to Juli and Ziggy."

"That sounds like a plan," said Jr. "Just one thing: are we going to tell chaos about this if it is possibility?"

"I don't know," said Shion. "What do you think, Allen?"

"Well, I'm kind of a romantic who loves a surprise. I think we should keep it a secret, if it is possible. We'll let him see her first hand when she wakes up and hope that everything works out for the best."

"I'll agree to that," said Jr.

Shion smile and relaxed back in her chair. "That's what I love about you, Allen." She closed her eyes. "_chaos, Kosmos, you'll only have to wait a little while longer_."

When they reached the ship, Jr. headed for the bridge while Allen and Shion headed for the Robot Academy. After conferring with the Professor, he told Shion that if it was a modern Realian, one that was highly humanoid, he felt it could be done with some modifications that, of course, he and Scott could handle. Shion left Allen to discuss moving the Academy to the planet while she went to contact Ziggy.

Ziggy appeared on the screen after Shion input the key sequence. "Shion. How are things going?"

"Wonderful," said Shion, beaming with happiness. "Ziggy, we've reached Lost Jerusalem. Not only that, we've found chaos and Kosmos and Jin."

"That's incredible. What are the coordinates?"

Shion gave them to him. "Listen, Ziggy, there's something I need to talk to you about. We've decided to stay and live here. I was wondering about you and Juli and Momo."

"I'll have to talk with Juli, of course, but I personally am excited about the idea. What's the planet like?"

"It's beautiful. I just know that you would all love it. Listen, Ziggy, is it possible you could get in touch with Juli and get back to me within a few hours? We're going to be headed back down to the planet and I'm anxious to hear the decision."

"Sure. I'll get in touch with her right now. Give me an hour, maximum."

"I look forward to hearing from you again." Shion switched off the terminal, and went to the women's quarters, looking for anything else she might want to take with her to the planet. Within forty minutes, she was being paged for a call.

"Hey, Ziggy. So, what's the word?"

"Juli is very excited about things, but she won't be able to come at this time. She is, as you know, in a very high position in the current government. I have convinced her to let Momo come with me, however. We can leave on our own ship by the end of this week."

"Ziggy, that's wonderful! I'm so excited to see Momo again! But I need to ask you a favor…" Shion gave him a list of the Realian parts that she would require.

"I'll see what I can do."

"Thanks, Ziggy. I'll talk to you again in a few weeks."

Just as Shion was ending her conversation, Jr. came off the bridge. Matthews, Hammer, and Tony felt that they weren't ready for retirement yet and planned to head back to the Dammerung for more work after the others had made their final descent. Shion was a little disappointed, but it was their decision. They headed downstairs to find that the Professor and Scott were excited about the prospect of moving the Robot Academy to the new planet. Loading some equipment that would help them establish a communications center on Lost Jerusalem, Allen, Shion and Jr. headed back down to the planet, promising to return the next day with more information. When they arrived at chaos' house, they could see where trees had already been cleared for two houses.


	11. Chapter 11

The characters and background of Xenosaga are property of Namco and Bandai, and are in no way my own.

Chapter XI

As expected, Ziggy and Momo left four days after talking to Shion. This meant a third house needed to be built, as well as the new Robot Academy. chaos suggested that everyone should help with the construction to help speed things along. In the meantime, he gave his room to Allen and Shion. The Professor, Scott, Jr. and he all slept in the main room of his house. He kept the door to Kosmos' room locked. They started building the Robot Academy first, so that they could move all of the Professor's equipment in, allowing the Elsa to return to the Dammerung. This happened within a month. Everyone said their good-byes, and Matthews said they'd all be back when they'd made enough money to retire.

Knowing that it would only be another three or four months before Ziggy and Momo arrived, Jr. approached chaos to ask a favor of him. "chaos, is there somewhere we can speak in private?"

"Of course," said chaos. "Why don't we take a stroll through the woods?" There was a group of ten teens working on building one of the houses, with Allen's help and Shion's supervision. The Professor and Scott were setting things up in the Robot Academy, including a communications center. As chaos and Jr. strolled leisurely through the woods, chaos asked "So, what's on your mind?"

"I've been thinking about not halting my cells anymore. You know, so that I can grow up. Well, physically. There are just a couple of things I'm not sure about."

"What are those?"

"Well to start, am I going to grow at a normal rate, or will I have some kind of growth spurt? And secondly, though maybe it should be first, where am I going to get some new clothes?"

chaos laughed. "We have some excellent tailors and seamstresses. Of course, it won't be the sort of things that you are used to exactly, but I would say that isn't a problem. As for your growth rate, I really can't say what would happen. But I may still be able to help."

"How?" Jr. stopped looking and looked at chaos.

"I still have some powers. I may be able to stimulate your growth. I just don't want to guarantee you anything."

"I guess that's going to have to do. I mean, what other choice do I have? I guess I should have thought about doing this years ago."

"The past is, unfortunately, something we cannot change."

"Isn't that the truth." Jr. looked down at the ground, thinking about his brothers.

"So, when should we start?"

"I was thinking as soon as possible."

"All right," said chaos, starting to walk again. "Why don't you go ahead and quit stopping your cells today. I think we should wait a week or two to see if you do have a natural growth spurt. If not, then we'll see what I can do. And if you do start shooting up like a beanstalk, then you'll have to borrow something from myself or Allen until we can have some new clothes made for you."

Jr. laughed slightly. "Man, that's two bad choices. Maybe I don't have any other choices." chaos smiled. "Thanks, chaos. I know that I can always talk to you."

"Don't mention it. Shall we head back then?"

"Yeah, I'm sure they could use some help. Or maybe Allen could use a break." chaos shook his head, smiling slightly as the two headed back down the path.

Within a week, Jr. did have a noticeable growth spurt or about two inches, but it really only made him look about fifteen instead of twelve. Shion tried to encourage him, telling him he would soon be taller than Allen, but Jr. wasn't convinced. After the second week when he hadn't shown any more growth, he and chaos took a walk again. chaos placed both his hands over Jr.'s head and closed his eyes, instructing Jr. to do the same. His hands began to glow, and a minute later when he opened his eyes and removed his hands, Jr. had grown another inch and appeared to have added some muscle.

"chaos, this is fantastic! Can you do it again?" Jr. was jumping up and down, he was so excited.

"Um, I think it would be better if you grew accustomed to this size first. We can try it again in another week."

"Aw, man. Hey, how old do I look now?"

"I don't know. Maybe seventeen?"

"Hmm. That's not going to do. Well, a few more times should be enough. I've gotta go see how I measure up to Allen!" Before chaos, could stop him, Jr. was running down the path. chaos rubbed his hand over his forehead, thinking it was probably more important that Jr. acted older, than looked older.

By the time chaos made it back to the construction site, Jr. was already talking excitedly to Shion and Allen. Apparently, Jr. was only three inches shorter than Allen. He said he hoped to be at least as tall as Allen, if not a little taller. Shion laughed at him. chaos decided to bypass this and check in on the construction team. Shion and Allen's house, which was closest to chaos', was almost finished being built.

Another month passed, with chaos assisting Jr. in his growth on a weekly basis. By the end of the month, Jr. was slightly taller than Allen, which made him very excited. Allen said it would take a lot of getting used to. Jr. had been borrowing some clothes from Allen, but now that he and chaos had decided he should stop growing, he went to see the seamstresses about making him some new clothing. He was actually surprised at what they came up with, though it did take some time. He had leather boots and blue pants that resembled denim, but were similar to linen or khaki in their material. He wore a white v-neck cotton t-shirt with a black jacket that matched his boots. He had designed the outfit himself and was quite proud of the way he looked, considering the circumstances. He kept his hair in mostly the same style.

Helping out with construction was having a good impact on him, too. First of all, it was helping him to build muscle mass, so that his upper torso was becoming quite toned. Also, he found himself naturally falling into a supervisory roll among the boys doing the construction. Being a successful leader was helping him to become more mature, which was not to say that he lost his playful side. But he was intent on giving Momo the impression that he was a man when she came, not a little boy. With Allen and Shion's house completed, they were now working on Ziggy, Momo, and Juli's house. Jr. wanted to make sure it was ready before they arrived. Besides, with Allen and Shion moved into their own place, there was more room at chaos', and he didn't seem to mind.

With Ziggy and Momo expected in two to three more months, Shion contacted their ship via the new communications center in the Robot Academy. She spoke to Momo about Momo beginning work on assembling the custom Realian. Momo had found almost everything that Shion had requested, and had customized the eyes herself when she couldn't find them. She was sure that everything would be ready for the Professor when they arrived. Shion told Momo that their house would be ready when they arrived as well, and that everyone was looking forward to seeing them soon.

After finishing her call, Shion decided that it was time to visit the seamstress who had done such a nice job making clothes for Jr. She wanted to commission a dress for Kosmos, something special, both flattering and beautiful. She had the perfect idea in mind. Giving Allen a kiss on the cheek as she headed out, she told him she'd be back later in the afternoon. As she traveled down the path, she hummed cheerily to herself.


	12. Chapter 12

The characters and background of Xenosaga are property of Namco and Bandai, and are in no way my own.

Chapter XII

Shion and Allen were sitting in their kitchen having breakfast one morning when there was a knock at the door. "Come in!" said Shion. It was Scott.

"Good morning, Shion, Allen. I hate to interrupt your breakfast, but there's a call for you Shion. It's Ziggy."

Shion dropped her toast. "_Could they be arriving already?"_ "I'll come right now!" She leapt up from the table and hurried out the door. Scott had to almost run to keep up with her. She entered the main room of the Robot Academy, slightly out of breath. "Ziggy. What's your status?"

"We are within a day's travel of Lost Jerusalem. Momo estimates that we should be landing between 1300 and 1500 hours tomorrow."

"Oh my god," said Shion, putting her hands up over her mouth. She was so excited she felt as though she was going to burst. "That's fantastic! I'll tell everyone. We'll have to have a celebration."

"Shion." Ziggy paused. He seemed to be concerned and considering his words. "Are you sure that we should have a celebration immediately upon arrival? Wouldn't you like to complete your project first?"

"My project?" Shion was puzzled. Suddenly it hit her and her eyes opened wide. "Oh, my, I almost forgot! Yes, you may have an important point. Hold on just a minute. Scott?" Shion turned around, searching the room for him.

Scott looked up from a table where he was working on some type of calculations. "Can I help you with something, Shion?"

"How long do you think it would take to transfer Kosmos' consciousness from her old body to her new Realian body?"

"I don't know with certainty. Anywhere from one to six hours I would estimate."

"I see." Shion turned back to Ziggy. "Well, even if it did take six hours, and you didn't arrive until 1500, that would be 2100. It would just be a late party right? Or do you think we should wait until the next day?"

"You should do whatever you decide is best. After all, we may arrive at 1300, and it might only take two hours to complete the transfer. It's a large window of variation."

"All right. I'll talk to the others. If we don't have the party tomorrow evening, we'll definitely celebrate the day after. I don't want you to think you're getting out of it."

"I wouldn't dream of it. I just think it would be a happier homecoming if everyone were present."

Shion smiled. "You're right. I'll see you tomorrow, Ziggy."

Ziggy smiled back. "Until then."

Shion turned off the link. "_Who should I tell first? I guess Allen. But after that…well, I suppose that Jr. is going to need the most time to prepare._" Shion laughed to herself as she imagined the panic that was going to consume Jr. At least chaos took everything in stride. She wondered if he was really so calm and collected on the inside too.

The next morning, Jr. was a perfect mix of excitement and nervousness. He found that he kept pacing around his room. He was going to see Momo, who was incredibly beautiful and then what. It hurt his head. "_I've got to find something else to do to kill the time_," he thought. Pacing just a little while longer, he made up his mind and headed over to Shion and Allen's house.

Jr. knocked on the door. "Come on in," said Allen. Jr. entered the room. Shion was preparing something in the kitchen and Allen was cleaning. "Hey, Jr., what's up?"

"I thought I'd come over and see if you guys needed any help getting ready for the party."

"Actually, we could use another table. Can we borrow yours?"

"Yeah, come on. I'll help you bring it over here."

"All right. Hey, Shion, we'll be right back, okay?"

Shion turned around. "Okay guys. Don't hurt yourselves or anything."

"It's just a table," said Jr. _"Maybe she's nervous too,"_ he thought.

The two men walked out of the house and over to Jr.'s. Allen grabbed one side of the table and Jr. took the other. As they were heading back to Allen's house, Allen asked Jr. "Do you think two tables are going to be enough?"

"Well, let's see. There're you and Shion, Ziggy and Momo, me and chaos, the Professor and Scott, plus Kosmos makes nine. It will be a tight fit."

"Maybe we can borrow a chair from somewhere to put on the end."

"Yeah. Hey wait! Is Jin, I mean Joseph, coming?"

"I hadn't thought about him. I guess for the sake of things, he really ought to be there."

"Yeah, but he has no idea that he ought to be there."

"I'll have Shion mention it to chaos. She's going over to his house in a while to have him bring Kosmos to the Academy."

"I'm glad it's her and not me." Just then they reached Allen's house and brought the table inside. They headed back to Jr.'s house for the benches, each man grabbing one. When they returned to Allen and Shion's house again, they arranged the two tables so that they formed one long table. "Now for some chairs…"

"I think that I can probably borrow some from the Academy," said Allen. "Why don't you see what else Shion needs help with while I go check?"

Shion turned around and Allen headed out the door again. "The tables look great. Well, I'll give you a choice Jr. You can either finish cutting up this fruit for me, or run an errand over at chaos' house."

"I'll cut the fruit!"

"All right." Shion rinsed her hands and dried them. "Just follow the pattern I've started. I'll be back in about ten to fifteen minutes."

"Mmm hmm." Jr. had already started slicing. Sighing, Shion headed out the door and over to chaos' house.

When she arrived, she found the front door open. chaos was inside crushing some herbs. "Good morning, chaos."

"Good morning, Shion. Please, come inside."

Shion did. Walking over to the table, she put her arms behind her back and watched chaos work. "chaos, as I'm sure you know, Ziggy and Momo will be arriving in a few hours. I was hoping that you could go ahead and bring Kosmos over to the Robot Academy. Momo has brought some of the parts that we'll need to repair her. I was hoping that we could get started immediately."

chaos quit grinding the herbs. He looked up, but not at Shion; rather he seemed to stare at nothing, the look of melancholy in his eyes. "Of course. I will bring her now." chaos got up from the table and walked to Kosmos' room. Shion followed behind him, but stayed in the doorway. She watched as he slowly pulled back the covers, exposing her damaged frame. Very gently, he slid his arms underneath her and lifted her from the bed. Shion thought that the way he did this with such care, one might really think that she could awaken at any moment from her slumber, stirred awake by sudden movement. As chaos approached the door, holding Kosmos, Shion smiled at him, encouragingly. chaos tried to smile in return, but it did not mask his sadness. Shion headed out of his house and to the Robot Academy, with chaos following behind. Once inside, Shion lead him to the maintenance bed they had reserved for her.

"Place her here, please," Shion said, motioning to the empty bed. chaos laid her down. As he removed his arms, he lightly squeezed her remaining hand before turning back to Shion.

"So, are we going down to meet Ziggy and Momo?" chaos asked. He looked like a very different person, as though the sadness was temporarily gone, or he was at least masking it better.

"Yes, I think that would be wonderful, don't you?"

"Yes. I have some more work to do, but please, stop by and tell me on your way."

"We will." chaos nodded and left. Shion walked over to Kosmos. "Kosmos. It's hard to believe that in only a few more hours you are going to be with all of us again. While you'll have a different form, I know that you will still be the same Kosmos that we all know and love. Maybe better. I hope that you'll be happy with the decision that we've made." Shion smiled, and squeezed Kosmos' hand as chaos had. "Oh! I almost forgot to pick up your dress!"

Shion headed back to her house to see how Allen and Jr. were doing. After giving them both some more instructions, she told them she had to run down to the village for something and would be back in plenty of time for them to all go and meet Momo and Ziggy.

"Oh yeah. One thing before you go," said Jr., pausing in his slicing.

"What's that?" asked Shion.

"Is Joseph coming tonight?"

"Oh. We haven't seen him in a while. I'd like it if he were. I'll ask chaos on my way. See you later!" With a smile and a wave she headed out the door.


	13. Chapter 13

The characters and background of Xenosaga are property of Namco and Bandai, and are in no way my own.

Chapter XIII

At a quarter to one, Shion, Allen, and Jr. headed over to chaos' house. "Come on, chaos, we're going to head on over now!" Jr. yelled through the window. chaos came out of the house and smiled at his friends.

"All right. Let's all go and wait together." The others nodded. They strolled down the beach to the same location that chaos had originally met them. Sitting down in the sand to wait, they talked about the celebration scheduled for that evening.

"chaos," said Shion. "Do you think Joseph might be able to come tonight as well? I really think it would be more of a reunion with him present."

"I can ask him to come, certainly." chaos leaned back, with his hands on the sand supporting him and closed his eyes. "Actually, he should be coming by my house in about an hour. I'll ask him then."

"Thank you, chaos." Shion smiled. Even if Joseph didn't realize he was Jin and held a special place with their group, she still wanted him to be there. Maybe having everyone together would spark a memory.

They waited almost an hour before Momo and Ziggy arrived. Jr. had grown antsy and was either pacing around or trying to skip stones. Allen sat next to Shion with his arm around her. chaos seemed to be meditating.

When the ship began its final descent, everyone stood up. Jr. rejoined the group. He swallowed hard, trying to calm his nerves. As the door opened, there stood Momo. "Welcome, Momo!" said Shion, but Momo seemed to only see one person.

"Jr.," she said, bringing her hands up towards her face. She couldn't believe her eyes. He was so tall and handsome.

"Hey, Momo," said Jr. He blushed slightly.

"Oh, Jr.!" Momo ran over to him and threw her arms around him. "Jr., I'm so happy!"

Jr. wrapped his arms around Momo as well, hugging her tightly. "I'm glad to see you, too, Momo." They stayed in their embrace for several long seconds. Ziggy came to the door, and saw what everyone else was looking at. No one said a word. Suddenly at almost the same time, Momo and Jr. seemed to remember that there were four other people standing around them. They released each other, both blushing.

"Shion! Allen! chaos!" Momo ran over and gave each of them a hug as well, though not as tender a hug as she had given to Jr. Ziggy came off the ship and walked over to Jr.

"Hello, Jr. You're looking good, I see." Ziggy smiled. He was proud of the choice Jr. had made.

"Hey, Ziggy," said Jr. "It's good to see you, too. Can I give you a hand with something?"

"Of course." Ziggy handed Jr. a couple of bags. He then greeted the others.

"Okay, everyone," said Shion, placing her hands together in front of her. "Let's all carry as much as we can so we don't have to make as many trips!" They all agreed to this plan. Allen and Ziggy carried the materials necessary for Kosmos, while Shion, chaos, Jr. and Momo carried Ziggy and Momo's personal belongings and some supplies. There was hardly anything left on board, and it seemed that only a few people would need to make a second trip.

When they arrived back at the houses, Ziggy and Allen went straight to the Robot Academy. The others dropped everything off at Ziggy and Momo's house. Momo got to work immediately unpacking and arranging things. Shion said she needed to take care of a few things at her house, and then was going to go to the Academy to set to work on Kosmos. Jr. and chaos agreed to go get the final things from the ship, and Ziggy joined them in time to accompany them.

As they were about to head out, Joseph came down the path from the woods. He had his hair pulled back in a ponytail. "Yeshua!" he called as he waved.

chaos waved back, and asked the other two to wait for a minute. "Joseph, I need to go help these two with something, so I have a favor to ask of you."

"Of course, Yeshua. How can I assist you?"

"Go into my house and take the two jugs of cider and the jug of wine over to Shion and Allen's house. It's the one right next to mine. Can you do that, please?"

"I would be happy to," Joseph said with a smile. chaos smiled and nodded at him, then joined Ziggy and Jr. as they headed down the beach.

Shion was in her kitchen, double checking the things for that evening's party. Considering the work ahead with Kosmos, she wasn't going to have much time later to work on things. As she closed the lid of the ice box, she heard a knock on the door. "It's open," she called. In walked Joseph, carrying the jugs that chaos had asked him to fetch. Shion had to catch her breath. With his hair pulled back, he looked almost exactly as Jin had when he was a teenager.

"Yeshua asked me to bring these drinks over," said Joseph, entering the dining area.

"Yes, of course. Please bring them into the kitchen." Shion couldn't take her eyes off him.

"Are you having some kind of celebration?" Joseph asked as he set the jugs on the floor. He was looking at the dining area which was crowded due to the tables and had some decorations hanging.

"Yes. Some more of our friends have arrived and we are celebrating."

"Oh, so it's like a reunion? Yeshua was telling me that is what you call it when everyone from a group returns to meet each other."

"Yes, it is like a reunion," Shion answered, trying to hold back her tears. "At least, almost everyone will be present." No longer able to fight her emotions, she started to cry. Joseph wasn't sure what to do.

"I'm sorry, did I offend you? I didn't mean to. Please don't cry," he said. He wondered why discussing the party would make her sad.

"No, really, it isn't your fault. It's just that…" Shion started to cry again. She couldn't bring herself to mention Jin. It just wouldn't be fair.

Joseph was unsure of what to do. He stood there, not knowing, when a sudden wave of déjà vu came over him. Somehow, standing here with this woman crying was familiar, but he didn't know why. Suddenly, a flash of one of his dreams came to his mind and he realized the woman he had seen on multiple occasions was Shion, though he didn't understand why. "No," he said. "I know that it is my fault. You have cried so many times before now, and always I am unable to comfort you. I don't know what the pain is that I've caused you, or how it is that I could have known you before I met you, but I'm sorry, Shion. I'm sorry that I've hurt you. Please don't cry anymore."

Shion did mostly stop crying, except for a few choking sobs. She turned and looked at Joseph, whose eyes were sorrowful and pleading. She realized that though he probably didn't realize it, it was Jin who was speaking through him. She wiped the tears from her eyes. "No, I'm the one who is sorry. You've never done or said anything wrong to me, Joseph. I shouldn't have put you through this. I just get emotional sometimes."

"Are you sure you're all right?" he asked, with a concerned look in his eyes.

"Yes, I'll be fine. Listen, Joseph, would you like to join us tonight? It will be much more upbeat, I promise. I'd really like it if you came. Everyone will be there, even Yeshua"

"Certainly," said Joseph. Shion smiled and Joseph smiled at her.

"Well then, I'll see you later tonight."


	14. Chapter 14

The characters and background of Xenosaga are property of Namco and Bandai, and are in no way my own.

Chapter XIV

After cleaning herself up, Shion headed over to the Robot Academy. Scott and Allen were assembling the new Kosmos on the bed next to the old Kosmos. Shion went to find the Professor.

"So, Professor, how are the preparations?"

"Bah! If my two assistants weren't taking so long assembling her body, we could have started already! Is a Realian really that different from a robot? They shouldn't be having any trouble with this." The Professor mumbled something else under his breath.

Shion laughed. "I'll go connect Kosmos up to the computer." The Professor nodded and mumbled again. Shion shook her head. She connected all the necessary wires from Kosmos to the computer, and then checked on Allen and Scott. They had finished their assembly. Shion got out the dress she'd commissioned for Kosmos and dressed her in it. Then she attached wires from the computer to the new Realian. Allen and Scott took their stations.

"We are ready to begin," said the Professor.

"All right," said Shion. "Let's get started." The Professor gave the signal and Allen booted up the system. Scott began the transfer program. Things seemed to be progressing smoothly. "How long do you think it will take?"

"At our current speed of transfer, two and a half hours," said Scott. Shion smiled. She could hardly wait.

When the transfer was complete and they were ready to wake Kosmos up, Shion insisted that she wanted to go and get chaos. She found him sitting on the beach, watching the waves wash upon the sand. "chaos."

He turned to see her and smiled. "Oh, Shion. Is something the matter?"

"No, it's nothing like that at all. Actually, I was coming to see if you'd come back to the Robot Academy, so you could be there when Kosmos wakes up." Shion bit her lower lip. She was trying to hide her excitement, thinking about what chaos' reaction might be when he saw Kosmos.

"Are you sure that would be all right? I wouldn't want to get in the way."

"There's nothing to worry about. The transfer is complete; we only need to give her the wake-up command now." chaos nodded. He stood up and walked with Shion to the Robot Academy. When they entered, Shion held chaos at the door for a moment and spoke to the other three who were waiting. "Um, Allen, since we're basically done here, why don't you take Scott and the Professor back to our house? You can start setting the places. I'll go round up the others in a minute."

Allen seemed to see immediately where she was going with this. "Okay. Come on, guys, you heard the lady." He winked at Scott, who nodded as if he understood the situation as well. Only the Professor seemed confused.

"Leave now? We aren't finished yet!"

"Come on, Professor," said Scott, taking him by the arm. "Shion can handle the rest."

"But…" His protests didn't matter. Allen and Scott pulled him out the door. chaos was puzzled by this turn of events. Shion walked over to the main station and started inputting a key sequence.

"chaos, can you come over here, please?" He walked behind the station. "Now, I have everything set up for you. All you'll need to do is press enter, and that will start her wake-up program."

"I? Don't you want to be here for this?" chaos was totally confused by Shion's words, and his face showed it. She smiled at him.

"You know how it is. I've got to get the party ready for the guest of honor. I'm sure that you'll be able to bring her to my house by yourself."

"Shion," said chaos. He understood what she was doing for him.

"Now I'll take no argument. I'll see you both in a little while." With a smile and a wave, she headed out the door.

chaos took a deep breath, then pressed the enter key. He could hear a machine generator start up. He turned and walked over to Kosmos. What he saw surprised him. "_A Realian? But why would Shion?"_ As he was trying to follow this line of thought, three low beeps told him that the procedure was finished. He placed his right hand on Kosmos' left shoulder and leaned slightly over her. They had matched the color of her hair perfectly. "Kosmos," he said softly. She stirred a little before her long dark lashes started to rise, revealing her crimson irises. chaos smiled. It was as if he was looking into them again for the first time. It had been almost nine years since he'd last looked into those eyes, and here they were, looking up at him again.

"chaos," she said. She blinked a few more times and looked around. "Where am I?"

"We're on Lost Jerusalem, in the Robot Academy."

"My body feels different and many of my functions are not responding. Do I require maintenance?" She seemed concerned.

chaos smiled slightly. "No, I don't think you need any repairs. The reason you are noticing these discrepancies is because you are no longer an android; you are a Realian."

Kosmos was silent for a moment. "This will affect my battle capabilities."

"I wouldn't worry about that. We won't be seeing battle anytime soon."

"Then you were successful?"

"Yes. Everyone is here on Lost Jerusalem already. In fact, they are waiting to see you."

"I see. Then we should go to meet them."

"Yes, if you are ready." chaos stepped back. Kosmos sat up, then swung her legs over the side of the bed she had been on. With a slight push, she found her feet. chaos found himself staring at her. Her skin was still pale as snow, and he felt the dress she wore suited her nicely. It was a strapless white linen dress with a scooped neckline and a low scooping back. There was a dark blue ribbon that went around her waist and tied in the back, and a matching ribbon around the hem which fell just below her knees. Kosmos started to step forward, but lost her footing. chaos caught her before she fell.

"I suppose it will take me a little while to get used to this body," she said, looking up and into his eyes.

"I'm sure it won't take long. For the time being, allow me to offer you my arm." Kosmos stood up and put her left arm through chaos' right arm. He smiled at her, and she smiled back. "Shall we try this again?"

"Yes," she said. "I believe I'm ready."

And so, chaos led Kosmos out of the Robot Academy and across the way to Shion's house, where everyone was waiting for them. They walked slowly, mostly so that Kosmos had time to adjust herself, and partly because chaos was not sure he was looking forward to the party. But, it was a short walk, and they soon found themselves at Shion's door. chaos took a deep breath.

"Well, here we go." He looked at Kosmos, who nodded.


	15. Chapter 15

The characters and background of Xenosaga are property of Namco and Bandai, and are in no way my own.

Chapter XV

When they came in the door, it seemed that everyone yelled or said something at the same time. As both Momo and Shion ran over to hug Kosmos, chaos silently slipped away from the action and sat down at the table next to Joseph. He smiled at the boy. "I see that you made it."

"Yes, Shion asked me personally to come. Yeshua, is this the woman who's been sick?"

"Yes. I'll introduce you to her when everyone else has settled down a little." Looking over at the scene, they were all crowding around Kosmos now, exchanging greetings or wanting to touch her. Surprisingly, Kosmos seemed to be taking it all in stride.

"You must be very happy," said Joseph, returning chaos' attention to his young friend. "I'm happy for you, too, that she has finally been able to awaken and her sickness is over." chaos just smiled. He wasn't sure what to say.

After a few minutes, everyone had calmed down as chaos had predicted, and Shion instructed everyone to have a seat at the table so they could eat. The two tables had space for four people on either side, and there was a chair at each end. On the side facing the kitchen sat Momo, Ziggy, Shion and Allen. At the end sat Jr. Continuing around the table clockwise sat the Professor, Scott, Joseph and chaos. Kosmos sat at the end opposite of Jr., between chaos and Momo.

Everyone was eating and there were always at least three conversations going on at the table at the same time, sometimes four or five. There was lots of laughing as they shared their memories. Then, chaos said something to Kosmos which made everyone stop and look, as well as several chins to almost hit the table and Shion to drop her fork.

"Something we should discuss, Kosmos, is where you are going to live." He said it very matter of factly and his face seemed void of emotion.

Jr. leaned over and whispered to Allen, "Has he lost his mind?"

Allen shook his head. His eyes were still wide with surprise. "I have no idea what he's thinking. Maybe he has lost it!"

Momo was the first to respond. "Um, chaos, I thought she already had a room in your house." She looked at him with very sad eyes. "_Does he not want her to live with him?_" she wondered.

"That is true," said chaos, "but she is not my prisoner. If she would rather live elsewhere, I will accommodate her wishes." Shion didn't breathe. She looked at Kosmos to see what her response would be.

Kosmos thought for a moment, then turned and looked at chaos. "I see no reason that I should not stay in your house, if there is already space for me there. Will I be a burden to you?"

"Of course not. But you are entitled to your freedom." chaos realized there was still some tension in the air, but he chose to ignore it by starting to eat again. Joseph decided to help him out by starting up a conversation again.

"So, Momo, how are you enjoying your new house so far?"

"Oh it's wonderful," she said smiling. "I have my own room and …" Conversation began to continue as it had and everyone seemed to push this slight disturbance from their minds. They stayed until about midnight, all except Joseph who left early to return to the village.

Kosmos was sleeping her in room when something woke her. She sat up in her bed and looked around. Though she could see nothing moving, she could hear a strange sound. It seemed far away. Kosmos got out of her bed and decided to investigate. She opened her bedroom door and walked into the dining room. The sound wasn't coming from this room or the kitchen. She opened the bathroom door, but the sound wasn't coming from there either. That left only one place left to check in the house. She walked across the room to chaos' door and opened it. She was surprised to see him sitting on a mat on the floor at the opposite side of the room, his legs pulled up against his chest with his arms around his knees. He was resting his head on his arms. This was definitely the sound of the noise.

Kosmos was surprised by how plain chaos' room was in comparison to hers. There were only two items of furniture in the entire room: a small dresser and a mat to sleep on. There were no other furnishings or decorations. "chaos," she said as she entered the room.

He looked up. She could see he had been crying. So that was the noise that she had heard. When he saw her, he wiped the tears away from his eyes. "Kosmos. Is everything all right?"

Kosmos walked across the room and sat down next to chaos on his left side. "I was investigating a noise I heard." She looked at him with deep concern, trying to study him. "Why are you crying?"

"Oh." He wiped his face again, to make sure his cheeks were dry. "I'm just happy, that's all." He tried to smile.

"I thought that humans cry when they are sad."

"Usually, but they can also cry when they are happy. You should ask Allen." chaos looked into her crimson eyes which were still studying him.

"Are you sure you are crying because you are happy? You don't look as if you are happy."

"Why shouldn't I be happy?" chaos looked away from her, staring into nothing directly in front of him. "I've spent almost nine years waiting for all of my friends to be reunited, and now, that day has come. Shion and Allen are married and living right next door, Momo and Jr. have both grown up, and Ziggy is still Ziggy, but you need someone who's dependable. And then there is you…" He returned his gaze to her. "There were times when I thought that I'd never see you again."

"chaos," she said. She was starting to feel sad.

chaos continued to look at her, but his facial expression began to change. "Kosmos, I…," he began, as he leaned in towards her. As she watched him, he closed his eyes and kissed her very tenderly. Kosmos closed her eyes as well. She was filled with emotion that she hadn't experienced before. She kissed him back and started to place her hand on his back when he pulled away. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have done that." He stood up.

Kosmos was confused. "chaos, but…"

He interrupted her. "Come on, I'll walk you back to your room." He smiled weakly and offered her his hand. Kosmos looked at him, trying to figure out what he was thinking and what had just happened. She placed her hand in his, and he helped her to her feet. They walked out of his room and over to hers. chaos stayed in the doorway as Kosmos went in. "Goodnight, Kosmos," he said.

She turned back and looked at him again. "Goodnight, chaos." He closed the door. Kosmos walked to her bed and lay down. For a while she just lay there, thinking about what had happened. She was fairly sure that chaos had lied to her about why he was crying. Then came the kiss, followed by an abrupt apology. None of it made sense to her.

She decided to go and talk to him. She got up and walked out of her room. As she came into the dining area, she was surprised to see that chaos' door was open. She looked over at the bathroom door, but it was open as well. She walked over to his room and was even more surprised that he wasn't there. "chaos?" she called. There was no answer. She was confused. _"Where is he?"_ she wondered. She walked back into the dining room and called his name again. Still, there was no response. Kosmos paused. "_It's the middle of the night. Where would he have gone?_"


	16. Chapter 16

The characters and background of Xenosaga are property of Namco and Bandai, and are in no way my own.

Chapter XVI

Kosmos walked to the front door and stepped outside. The moon was just past its first quarter and cast quite a bit of light for Kosmos to see by. As she surveyed the scene, she thought she could see someone sitting on the beach. Kosmos started walking towards this person, and as she came closer it became clear from the silver hair shining in the moonlight that she had found chaos. He was sitting only a few feet from where the waves were washing upon the shore, with his knees pulled up against himself, just as he had been in his room. Only now, he was looking out at the sea.

As she reached him, he turned his head and looked up at her. "Kosmos. You couldn't sleep?"

She sat down on his left hand side. "No. I guess I'm just not tired. What are you doing out here?"

chaos looked back out at the ocean. "Sometimes," he said, "I just like to sit here and watch the waves." He paused. "It's very calming."

Kosmos looked out at the water. The waves steadily rolled in and lapped upon the beach before the waters were pulled back again. As this process repeated itself over and over, Kosmos understood chaos' words. "chaos, is there something you'd like to talk about?" She turned to look at him again.

chaos kept looking at the ocean. The corners of his mouth rose slightly, as in the first stage of a smile. "I see. I suppose I do owe you an explanation, though most of what I have to say should be familiar to you."

He took a deep breath. "Thousands of years ago, I walked this very earth. But I wasn't alone; there was a woman, named Mary. We were inseparable, as if we completed each other. I loved her very deeply and she loved me. Then one day, she sacrificed herself for me and countless others. My life seemed to lose its meaning; I longed for nothing more so than death. For centuries, I wandered, not sure why I existed, vainly hoping that I could one day see her again, whether in this world or the next. And then, I met you.

"The moment I saw you, I knew that you were made in her image. You gave me a hope that I had forgotten. As I spent time with you, certain things that you would say or do reminded me so much of her, that I felt certainly she was sleeping somewhere, and I would eventually meet her again. And after the incident with T-elos, for a brief moment, there she was, standing before me again; yet, I could do nothing.

"Now, here we are, sitting together again on Lost Jerusalem. I've never stopped loving Mary, and when I look at you, I know that I love you. But, I don't know what your feelings are and I want you to be able to live the life that you want to live, to make your own decisions. My feelings shouldn't influence you. And that is why I'm sorry for my actions earlier. I was highly inappropriate."

Kosmos looked back at the ocean. For a few minutes, they were both silent. Then, Kosmos spoke. "If it's all right, I'd like to sit here with you for a while longer."

"Of course," said chaos. He leaned back and lay down on the sand, stretching out his legs and placing his hands behind his head for support as he gazed at the stars. Seeing this, Kosmos laid down as well, resting her head on chaos' arm. Neither one said a thing; they just stared into the vast sky. Eventually, chaos noticed that Kosmos' breathing pattern had changed. He looked over at her and realized she had fallen asleep. He smiled. Gently removing his arm from under her head, so as not to wake her, he got to his knees. He then placed one arm under her knees and one under her neck and lifted her off the ground. He carried her back up to the house and into her room. After placing her in her bed, he kissed her on her forehead. "Goodnight, Kosmos." chaos returned to beach and looked back out at the ocean.

When Kosmos awoke in the morning, she was surprised to find herself in her room. "_That's strange,"_ she thought, "_I don't remember coming back here last night._" Kosmos got up and looked out her window. It was a bright and sunny day. She heard a noise in the kitchen and went to see what chaos was doing. To her surprise, it was not chaos but the young boy she had barely met the evening before. As she came into the dining room, he turned to greet her.

"Oh, good morning, Kosmos, did you sleep well?"

"Yes, thank you. Where is chaos?" She sat down at the table.

Joseph smiled. By now he was accustomed to Yeshua's friends referring to him as chaos. "Something happened at one of the mines and Yeshua went to see what he could do. He asked me to stop by; I hope you like eggs for breakfast."

Kosmos could see that he was already making them. That had been the noise she heard. "That will be fine. When do you think chaos will return?"

"I couldn't say specifically, but I think he should definitely be back by this afternoon. Now then, eggs and juice, for your pleasure." He set them down in front of Kosmos.

"Thank you, Joseph. It's very kind of you." She started to eat as Joseph sat down across from her.

"No, it's nothing. I'm truly honored that Yeshua would ask me to take care of you." Kosmos stopped and looked at the boy. "_So he knows about chaos' feelings as well…"_ She decided not to ask him about it though; instead, she would go and talk to Shion.

When she was finished, Kosmos thanked him again. "Thank you for the eggs. They were very good. If you will excuse me, I am going to go and see our friend Shion."

"Of course," was his reply. "I have other things that I need to attend to anyway. Perhaps I'll see you later."

Kosmos smiled and nodded, then left the house. She walked to Shion and Allen's house and knocked on the door. Allen answered. "Kosmos! Come on in. Have you had breakfast yet?"

"Yes, thank you. Is Shion here?" Kosmos came into the main room. Shion came out of her bedroom.

"Good morning, Kosmos. Did you sleep well? What did you think of your room?" Shion tied her hair back and sat down at the table. Allen brought over their breakfast.

"Good morning, Shion. I believe that I slept well, and my room is quite satisfactory, thank you for asking." She sat down at the table across from Shion and Allen. "Shion, there is something that I need to ask you, which is why I've come here this morning."

"Okay, what do you want to ask me?" Shion tilted her head slightly. It was nice to see that Kosmos was inquisitive.

"What is it like to feel love?" She looked at Shion very earnestly. Allen almost choked on his toast.

"_Something happened last night that we don't know about,"_ thought Shion. "Well, Kosmos, that is a tough question to answer. I mean, I don't think it's exactly one feeling. And yet, it is a very distinct feeling so that once you know that love is what you are feeling, you will never mistake it for something else again. Hmm. Where should I begin?" She looked at Allen. He took another bite of his toast. He sort of wished he wasn't present for this conversation. She turned back to Kosmos.

"It's like a feeling of warmth. You care deeply about a person and you want to share everything with him: emotions, items, experiences. When he is happy, you want to be happy; when he is sad or in pain, you want it to be yours instead. You put that person's feelings and desires above your own, and would do anything for them if it was in your power. Of course, there is the physical aspect as well, where you desire physical contact with that person, and that can take many forms, which I won't elaborate on right now. Does that help some?"

Kosmos considered Shion's words. "Yes, I think that it gives me a good frame of reference. Thank you, Shion."

"You're welcome. So, is there someone or some reason in particular that inspired you to ask me that?" Shion smiled slightly. She was hoping to hear a juicy confession.

"I was simply curious, that's all." Shion thought that Kosmos might have blushed a little, but she wasn't sure.


	17. Chapter 17

The characters and background of Xenosaga are property of Namco and Bandai, and are in no way my own.

Chapter XVII

While Shion was still considering Kosmos' response, there came another knock at the door. "Come in," called Shion. It was Momo.

"Hi, Shion! Hi, Allen! Oh, Kosmos is here, too. Hi, Kosmos!" Momo smiled radiantly. "I was thinking that it was a nice day outside, so we should all go down to the beach! What do you say?"

"Well, I'm supposed to be at the Robot Academy this morning," said Allen. "The Professor, Scott and I have some serious work to do still."

"I have to call Miyuki and give her our status report, as well as find out how things are going on the Dammerung and with their operations," said Shion.

Momo looked disappointed. "Jr. couldn't come either, because Ziggy wanted to talk to him, and he said he didn't have a swimsuit. What about you, Kosmos?"

"I am not sure that I have a swimsuit either," she said.

"That's okay; you can borrow one of mine! I'm sure that we are the same size, since we are almost identical series of Realians."

"In that case," said Kosmos, "I would be happy to join you."

Momo smiled and clasped her hands together. "Great! Come on; let's go get you a swimsuit." She grabbed Kosmos by the hand and pulled her out the door.

Momo picked out a pale blue bikini for herself, and gave Kosmos a white one to wear. Sure enough, it fit Kosmos. Momo wasn't surprised at all. They headed down to the beach and started to build a sand castle. When it was about half way constructed, Kosmos asked "Momo, does it make you sad that Jr. was unable to come here?"

Momo frowned a little. "I was disappointed that he couldn't come, but I know that he will come next time, because he promised me that he would. He's never broken a promise before." She looked at Kosmos and smiled. "Besides, it's okay; now you and I can spend time together." Kosmos nodded. They continued building. "Um, Kosmos, can I ask you something, too?" Kosmos looked up at her. "Does it make you sad that chaos isn't here?"

Kosmos looked down at the sand castle. "I guess it does, a little," she said.

"Boys," said Momo. "They just don't know what we go through for them." Kosmos laughed and then Momo laughed, too. Kosmos could see that Momo would make a good confidante.

They were three-quarters of the way finished with their sand castle when chaos came off the path from the village. He saw Kosmos and Momo playing in the sand and smiled. He decided to go and check on them. Momo saw him coming and whispered something to Kosmos. Kosmos nodded.

chaos reached their castle. "Good morning, ladies. Are you having fun?"

"Absolutely!" said Momo. "What do you think of our castle so far?"

"I think it looks great; it's very realistic."

"Why don't you join us, chaos?" asked Kosmos.

"I'm sorry," he said, "but there are other things that I need to take care of."

Kosmos looked at Momo. "Well, I think I'm going to go swimming." She jumped up and ran to the water, bracing herself against the waves. chaos looked after her.

Kosmos was about waist deep when Momo asked, "chaos, does Kosmos know how to swim?" chaos looked down at Momo, with almost shock at the suggestion he had not considered. He looked back up in time to see a wave overtake Kosmos; she did not stand back up. His face contorted to horror and he took off running. "_What was she thinking?!?_" he thought as he pushed through the waters to her location.

When he reached her, he pulled her up out of the water. Supporting her with his left arm, he pushed her hair out of her face with his right hand. She didn't seem to be breathing. "Kosmos! Kosmos!" he screamed. "_How can this be happening?" _he thought. "Kosmos!" he said again, as he shook her. Kosmos opened her eyes.

"Gotcha," she said, and burst out laughing.

chaos was really in shock now. He took a few moments to process what had happened. He looked back to the shore and saw that Momo was laughing as well. When she saw him she waved. "_Did she put Kosmos up to this?_" He looked back at Kosmos. She was laughing less, but still smiling. He couldn't believe she was laughing. She brought up her right hand and ran it through his hair. His face softened, and he was looking at her as he had the night before.

"Yeshua!" chaos turned and saw Joseph further up the beach, motioning to him. He turned back to Kosmos, with a little sadness in his eyes, though he tried to smile.

"I'm sorry, I have to go." Making sure that Kosmos was standing on her own, he released her and started to make his way out of the water. Kosmos reached out her arm to grab him, but stopped herself. Her smile faded away as well. When chaos reached the shore and came upon Momo, she also looked at him with sadness and disappointment. He smiled and patted her on the shoulder as he walked past and joined Joseph. The two headed back down the path to the village.

Kosmos came out of the water and sat down on the beach as she had with chaos the night before. Momo came and put her arm around Kosmos and hugged her. "Don't worry, Kosmos. I'm sure that everything will work out just fine. You just need to give it time." Kosmos nodded. Momo would certainly know about these things.

"I know! Let's look for seashells," said Momo. She smiled brightly.

"All right," said Kosmos, smiling back. She told herself that thinking about something else was the best thing to do.

That night, Kosmos waited at the dining room table for chaos to return. It was already dark when she heard the front door. However, it was Joseph who entered, not chaos. "Good evening, Kosmos," he said with a smile.

"Good evening, Joseph. Is chaos not with you?" She stood up and looked behind him.

"No, I'm afraid he had something to take care of. He asked that I come and check on you."

"It's very kind of you," she said, sitting down again. "What time do you think he'll be back?"

"Well, that's hard for me to say." Joseph looked a little distraught about what he was about to have to tell her. "The truth is, he said he was going away for a little while to take care of some things. He asked me to come by every day he was gone and see if there was anything that I can do for you."

Kosmos was wide-eyed. "For a while? Joseph, where did he go?" She was concerned.

"I really don't know. I'm sure it's nothing to worry about. He has done this before on several occasions. He never says where he goes, and the longest he's ever been gone was a little over a month."

"A month?" Kosmos placed her head in her hands. So many thoughts started to go through her head that she couldn't keep track of them all.

"I'm sorry, Kosmos, I didn't realize that he hadn't told you. Truthfully, I'm a little surprised he didn't. But there really is no need to worry, and hopefully it will only be a few weeks." Kosmos tried to smile. Surely, it wasn't Joseph's fault and she didn't mean to make him feel badly for having to tell her.

"It's all right, Joseph. I'm just a little surprised, that's all. I appreciate your coming, but if you don't mind, I think I'm going to go to bed." She stood up and started to head for the door.

"I understand," said Joseph. "I'll see you tomorrow, then. Goodnight."

"Goodnight, Joseph." Joseph left and Kosmos went to her room and tried to sleep.

As promised, Joseph came twice a day to see Kosmos. Sometimes he would make her breakfast, sometimes dinner, and sometimes it was just a brief conversation wherein she would tell him that she didn't need anything. Kosmos spent most of her time with her friends, though she felt sometimes that she was intruding if Momo and Jr. were together, even though they told her she could still hang out with them. Shion and Allen weren't as bad together, but she preferred large group settings or spending time with just one of them at a time.

She also spent time by herself, when she would go for walks, sit in her room gazing out the window, or down at the beach. All the while, she was awaiting chaos' return, though she tried not to think about it too much. Instead she tried to keep herself busy most of the day.


	18. Chapter 18

The characters and background of Xenosaga are property of Namco and Bandai, and are in no way my own.

Chapter XVIII

He had been gone seventeen days when chaos finally returned. It was close to two in the morning, so he came very quietly into the house, hoping to not wake up Kosmos. He walked to his room and upon opening the door, stopped right in his tracks. There lay Kosmos, curled up and sleeping on his little mat on the floor. "_What in the world is she doing in here?_" he thought. He shook his head and walked across the room. Very carefully, he picked her up and carried her back to her own bed. He laid her down, but as he was tucking her in, she woke up.

"chaos, you've come home."

He smiled. "Yes. But it's very late. Please, go back to sleep."

He started to leave, but Kosmos grabbed his arm. "chaos, wait!" She rose up and bringing herself to her knees, she threw her arms around his neck and hugged him. chaos was unsure about what he should do, but he brought his arms up and placed them around her waist, hugging her in return. She moved back slightly so that she could look him in the eye, but kept her wrists crossed behind his head. She looked deep into his eyes with a bit of sadness and earnest. chaos didn't move, for he was unsure what was about to happen.

"It's true, that I'm not Mary. But some part of Mary is still with me; perhaps she chose me over T-elos because of you. I don't know. I don't have any of her memories, but I think that I have some of her feelings. I want to share your happiness and create new memories with you. When you are upset, I want to bear your sadness."

"Kosmos," chaos said, his eyes brimming with tears.

"chaos, I love you." Several tears ran down chaos' cheeks. Kosmos cupped his face with her hands and wiped them away with her thumbs. Then, she leaned in and kissed him passionately. "Stay with me tonight," she said, looking into his eyes again.

"I shouldn't," he said.

"But I want you to."

"Are you sure?" he studied her carefully. She nodded and sat down on the bed, moving over so that there was space for him. chaos sat down next to her. He wrapped his arms around her and they both lay down, with Kosmos snuggled up next to his chest. She closed her eyes. "_This is perfect,"_ she thought. chaos kissed her forehead and closed his eyes as well. Soon, they had both fallen asleep.

The sun was already well into the sky when Kosmos awoke. As she opened her eyes, she was pleased to find chaos' arms still wrapped around her. She smiled, and closing her eyes again she breathed him in. She gently ran her hand up and down his back. This seemed to wake chaos, who ran his hand over her hair. "Is it morning already?" he asked.

"Yes, but let's stay here a while longer," she replied, snuggling closer to him.

He laughed slightly and kissed her forehead. "That would be nice, but at any moment Jr. is liable to be looking at us through your window."

"What?" She turned her head and looked at the window. There was no one there. She turned back to chaos. "Why would Jr. be looking through the window?"

chaos laughed again. "Well, he's been known to be quite the eavesdropper; I wouldn't be surprised if he had taken up spying on people by other means. Either way, someone is bound to come by the house. What then?"

Kosmos sighed. "Yes, Joseph should be here anytime. What if I just tell him I don't feel well? Perhaps he'd just leave quietly."

"You forget that I've been training him in medicine. He'd rush to your side to try and cure you in order to keep his promise to me."

Kosmos made a pouty face. "Why do you have to make things so complicated?"

"I'm sorry." He kissed her tenderly. "Come on, I'll make you breakfast." With that, he rolled over, swung his legs over the side of the bed and stretched his arms. He stood up and turned to face Kosmos. "How about pancakes?"

Kosmos propped herself up with her elbow. She had a sad, disappointed look in her eyes. "I suppose."

"Hey, now," chaos looked concerned. "Don't give me that look." He leaned down and caressed her face. "Please don't be sad."

She smiled and placed her hand over his which was still against her cheek. "I'm all right. Let's go." chaos smiled back and stood up again. He headed for the door. Kosmos got out of bed and followed him. As he went into the kitchen and started preparing the ingredients, Kosmos sat at the table, facing him. She placed her left elbow on the table and supported her head with her clenched hand as she watched him. chaos had just finished mixing the batter when there was a knock at the door.

"Come in," he called.

Joseph walked down the hall. "Oh, Yeshua, you are home," he said with a smile.

"Yes, I came back last night. You are just in time for pancakes. Won't you join us?"

"Yes, thank you." Joseph walked past Kosmos and whispered in her ear "I told you he'd be back before long." He sat down opposite of her.

Kosmos reached across the table and put her hand over his, giving it a light squeeze. Leaning forward, she whispered "You were absolutely right." They smiled at each other as Kosmos returned to her normal seated position.

"So, Joseph," said chaos as he was pouring the first pancake into the pan, "what are the plans for today?"

"Well," said Joseph, turning to face chaos, "while you were gone I discovered another patch of Echinacea and some elderberry trees. I was thinking…" He stopped himself. He turned and looked at Kosmos, who had a look on her face which seemed to Joseph to say "_He's just returned and you are taking him away again?_"

"You were thinking?" asked chaos, turning to look at Joseph. Joseph turned back to look at chaos.

"Um, I was thinking that we could collect some ingredients tomorrow. Today looks like it will be quite nice, and since you've just returned from a long trip, maybe you should just take it easy. We could just hang out, or maybe go down to the beach or for a picnic or something. What do you think, Kosmos?" He turned to look at her again. She smiled.

"I think any of those things would be wonderful."

"Okay," said chaos, smiling as well. "After breakfast, we'll go and see what the others are up to. Maybe we can all do something relaxing today." He went back to making pancakes. Kosmos smiled at Joseph and mouthed the words "thank you". He nodded.

After breakfast, Joseph helped chaos with the dishes. When they were finished, chaos dried his hands and walked over to Kosmos. Offering her his hand, he said, "Shall we go, Kosmos?"

She placed her hand in his. "Yes, let's go together." Holding hands, they followed Joseph out the door.


End file.
